My Own Words

I have a new laptop, some new goals for myself, and a lot of wasted time in between now and my last post.

It's not like I haven't been doing anything. I have a lot of new material to work with that I'm very excited about. It's amazing how many things get in the way of living the kind of life that you want to live. Trying to have a social life, trying to survive by working, trying to help other people. It seems that lately everything I have been trying to do has prevented me from actually doing the things that I care about the most. I don't understand how I am going to survive and pursue my dreams at the same time, but I know that it's time for me to gain a new perspective on my life and make those dreams the priorities instead of thinking of them as things that will hopefully work out someday.

And when it comes to my songs, sometimes I forget to hear my own words. What about all I've written about following my dreams? About chasing the things that I really want the most? About focusing on the things that are most important to me?

I give some pretty good advice. Maybe I should try taking my own advice.

~Eliza

Stay Inspired

The ordinary life I mentioned is pretty boring and at times overwhelming, but I have something to aspire to-always stay inspired!

When I do have free time, there are too many other things to take up that time. I want to be able to keep up with my friends and spend time with them. I want to get all of my errands done quickly. I want to have time to relax and enjoy myself once in a while, whether that means sleeping in, relaxing in front of the tv, or enjoying my favorite foods. And top of all of that, I want plenty of time to devote to my writing.

Life doesn't work that way. We don't always get what we want and we rarely have enough time, especially when we have to spend so much of our time chasing money to survive.

As I was thinking about this the other day, I remembered that my time being taken up by work was once an inspiration for a song called Money Owns Me. That's an example of a way to stay inspired, even when life seems boring, dull, tiring, or stuck in the same place for a long period of time. Sometimes it's hard to follow your dreams or accomplish all the things you want to do, but no matter what, stay inspired.

~Eliza

Leading the Ordinary Life

I want to live in pursuit of my dreams and I want to see my dreams come true. In the meantime, I lead the ordinary life that helps me survive while I conquer the smaller tasks that I face.

I'm working two jobs right now. It's rarely fun and it's exhausting. Hard work is harder than I thought, but at the same time I know that I'm doing what I need to do right now. I need to be making enough money to pay off some things and put some money into my savings. And right now working two jobs is my way to do that.

Once I get some of these other issues straightened out, I want to improve my knowledge of music and songwriting. I have been wanting to take some classes on these subjects for a while, but it seems that when it's not time that's the problem it's money. And unfortunately I can't make those problems go away magically. I don't have money lying around to use for those kinds of classes or to invest in demos or travel. All I can do at the moment is work as hard as I can and keep in mind that it will pay off.

We all have to work. We all have bills to pay. That's just what life is right now, but that doesn't mean that it's all bad. When I get home from a day of working both jobs, I pretty much just want to grab something to eat and go to bed, especially if I'm working both jobs the next day. It's a lot of work and it takes its toll, but I try to remind myself to see the inspiration and creativity in my everyday, ordinary life. I interact with all kinds of different people every day. It helps to imagine what my customers lives are like and what makes them who they are. That doesn't mean that I have developed deeply personal relationships with my customers, but from just a few moments of interaction my brain races to fill in the gaps with the information I have. It's a fun way to remind myself to stay creative and continue to be inspired by the incredible possibilities involved in character development.

I may lead an ordinary life now, but I have not lost sight of the things I want for the future. Someday I will actually be spending more of my time doing things that I really enjoy. In the meantime, it's the same old story for me.

~Eliza

Goals Progress

Well, I might not be as "back in business" as I thought. I have been relying on my nook color for updates. Regular internet access is not much of a problem, but this device freezes up a lot. On top of that work takes up a lot of time as well.

Inspiration, however, has not been lacking. I've come up with some great ideas in the past few days. Meeting my goal of adding five new songs to my songbook for the month is coming along pretty well. Completing Run to You is going to be a challenge though. I have the chorus and two versions of the first verse. Once I decide which version I want to use I'll be able to finish the rest of the song. This is what I have for  the chorus.

I run to you when I get hurt
And you let me cry on your shoulder
I curse your name when you turn away
And make me stand on my own
I have no choice but to stand on my own
I have no choice but to stand on my own

~Eliza

The Desperation Mode of Lyric Writing

Oh yes, lyric writers get blocked, too! Then comes the desperation mode. You've been stuck. You've been uninspired. You haven't written anything in several days or more and you're dying to get out of your dry spell. And in your desperation you pick up a pen and just start writing, with or without the inspiration that so often drives  you. The next day you look at what you wrote and laugh so hard you fall to the floor.

I have definitely been there. And I've had plenty of those"I wrote THAT? And I thought it was GOOD?" moments. Even if no one sees it it still feels embarrassing. Those moments are good lessons in humility.

The question is how to get past that desperation and get back your full writing potential and ability. There are a few methods you could try that might help.

Free Writing

Don't let desperation control your writing! Free writing forces you to do what you can with your talent whether you feel inspired or not and may end up inspiring you in way that helps you overcome your dry spell. If you force yourself to free write for a good amount of time you'll probably come up with something you can use, even if it's only a line or two. If you were completely stuck on your writing before, then it's a move forward. And if you were just feeling uninspired something you wrote while you were free writing may end up giving you some fresh ideas. It's natural to occasionally feel uninspired or blocked, but allowing the mentality of "I don't know what to write anymore" sink in is the worst thing you can do. Reminding yourself that you don't knoe what to write sometimes is no way to push yourself back into your normal writing routines.

Writing Prompts

There are plenty of resources that provide writing prompts. If you're having trouble coming up with new ideas in your head, let these help you. Some online resourcrs for this are www.writingprompts.com and www.writersdigest.com. You can also find many idea and prompt books for writers in bookstores and online stores that sell books. While many prompts that are for writing in general are geared towards writing stories, most of these can still be helpful in generating ideas for lyrics.

Getting Back to the Basics

When was the last time you really thought about why you love writing and what motivates you to do it? Sometimes we get so caught up in trying to make our lyrics poetic or witty that we forget some of the basics about lyric writing. Remind yourself why you bother with it to begin with and the people that inspired you to have a deeper interest in songwriting. Give yourself a fresher perspective and allow yourself to enjoy writing lyrics again instead of stressing over it.

~Eliza

Goals for September 2012

I like to keep my goals pretty simple. My goals for September are to...

-finish " Run to You"
-add five complete new songs to my songbook (completing old fragments does not count towards this goal)

Short, simple, and to the point. Just the way I like it!

~Eliza

The Great Return

I am finally back in business, thank goodness! I still don't have regular internet access, but I recently purchased a tablet so I should still be able to get online to update my blog and  do the other things I need to do every 1-3 days.

Now that the quick update is taken care of, it's time to get back to the usual stuff.

I have obviously had plenty of time to write some new material since my last post. Most of them are fragments. In the past three weeks I have moved again, left my old job, and started a new one. That's not more than I can handle, but it has provided me with minimal stress and a good deal of distractions, the latter being the larger problem.

I don't have any deeply personal or  analytical material to post today, but  since it has been so long since I updated I think it's only fair to post one of the fragments  I came up with during my hiatus. Enjoy!

I wish I could be that unaffected
I struggle with each step and you
hold your head so high
with you it's like nothing even happened
you have no  trouble forgetting me
I can't even look you in the eye

~Eliza